Saturday, January 31, 2015

To Warm the Winter's Cold

Being single is not the end of the world.  There are other problems out there that are far more depressing than being single — hunger and homelessness, for instance.

I was asked out on a date not too long ago.  I never accepted.  I never made plans to contact him. If I had, I would have probably canceled the date.  I didn’t have the 'like' feelings for the guy who asked me out.  I knew I wouldn’t be interested in him no matter how many dinners we had, or how many movies we saw.  I’m happy that I’m single right now, and I’m not saying that in a dippy or defensive way.  I obviously still want to one day be involved with someone who will love me in that lovey-dovey way.  I am not opposed to being in a committed relationship.

There are reasons that I have not gotten involved.  I’m not living in a place that I want to root myself to.  I want to move.  Where I move to has to support my career goals, and I have to enjoy living there.  At this point, where I am at right now in my life, commitment or being on the road to commitment doesn’t really make sense to me (and I’ve never really figured out the whole casual dating scene).  Casual dating is not my thing.  I’m glad I’m not tied to someone because then I'd have to consider altering my plans to fit theirs. 

I am fulfilled on my own.  I have been in the past and I am currently.  I want to make my own decisions.  I want to be able to do things without having to ask permission or talk to someone about my plans.  I like the idea of lounging around my house on some days in sweats and maybe not eat a real dinner tonight, or supplement my breakfast with candy, and yes I do that.

I want to have concrete steps taken in the direction of fulfilling my passion before involving myself with someone who I would 'maybe' want to share my life with.