Sunday, August 9, 2015

All You Need is One Safe Anchor to Keep You Grounded

The biggest obstacle that stands between me and my writing is me. I schedule my writing time, but find I'm a better writer when I am writing in a flow versus in a time crunch. My thoughts are natural and free flowing when I don't force them. I understand that because I am paid to write, and deadlines loom, I need to maintain a schedule. For me, writing isn't a hobby or a pastime, it’s a necessity. It's a job. It’s how I survive.
When I am here on my blog, my thoughts should not be rushed, nor do they need to be written in perfect prose. There have been moments where I feel like I'm rushing to get something written, and I'm forcing myself, which then causes my mind to go blank. I know, for the most part, when people come here to read, they want to get to know me. It's not always comfortable to talk about myself. I tend to be a private person. I'm a firm believer in the good and the bad. I don't like anyone to get this picture perfect image of me because if they ever get the chance to meet me, they are going to see that I'm flawed.
Perfection is an illusion, and I don't pretend to be perfect.
I don't mind sharing the details of my recent vacation, or cute stories about my childhood. I don't mind talking about my dislikes, or even my imperfections, but right now I seem to be focused. That energy is directed towards writing.
I could tell you what I'm up to right now, but that might come off as boring because what I am doing right now is building up a business, and with that comes a massive amount of time spent at a keyboard, typing out words, and building portfolios.
I've made sacrifices. What that means for me is that I don't have random stories about how certain things in my day went wrong, or any rants because someone pissed me off. I don't have any work place drama; I work for myself, and I'm not big on drama. I won't be walking in a field, capturing the emotions I felt because I'd just witnessed the perfect sunset, even though I love sunsets. I probably won't be talking about what happened last night over cocktails because I haven't been out in awhile. Building a business is hard, and it takes commitment.
The writer needs to write, and sometimes that means I'm working fourteen hours in a day just writing, with a few breaks, because the words are writing themselves, and I don't want to disrupt that flow. And other days, I am working on getting the words to flow, not because I have writer's block, but because I haven't decided on how the story or article I'm writing will flow. I've noticed that once I start writing, the writing comes easily. I just have to get the first couple of sentences on the page and it turns into something like this.
August is short story month, and I've pledged to write at least a page every day. I don't necessarily write a chapter a day, or write a new page for the story I was working on yesterday. I write down what I am thinking, and I give that thought a foundation which I will later build on. At times those thoughts are skeletons that I will later fill in with descriptions and dialogue, and other days I am writing page after page of a story that is running through my head. Sometimes I have writing prompts sent to me and I chose to work on them.
My hope is that I will create enough content during this month that I'll be able to launch a website full of writing samples, as well as have stories written to submit to magazines, and possibly have a couple of articles to sell.
Writing is my soul. I love what I'm doing, but it's not easy work.