Saturday, December 27, 2014
I know the key to writing, even when I don't feel like writing, is writing. Write your way to what you want by writing about anything. Once upon a time, starting a journal saved me. It wasn't a conventional journal, but it served the same type of purpose. Now, years later, starting a blog is essentially the same thing. The every day practice of writing your thoughts in a journal is powerful in that it can help cultivate what you want from life. In my case it helps channel my energy, directs my mind's focus, but sometimes my mind doesn't feel much like it wants to focus. There is an art to creating the life you are hoping for, and doing it on your terms. I am basing all my hopes for the future on my desires, talents, values, and dreams. The pressure can get a little overwhelming, and it's a little scary. I'm starting year one right now because unforeseen circumstances halted my progress. I'm in that stage where I'm having to learn to not allow my fears or my insecurities to step in and block what I want most in life for me. This journey begins with the seeds I had already planted years ago. To this day, those seeds still bloom.
Saturday, December 20, 2014
As much as I loved being a bartender and the people I worked with, I woke up one day and decided that bartending no longer gave me a sense of fulfillment. There was no thrill in mixing drinks and creating new ones. There came a point when I could no longer justify spending my days working behind a bar doing something that didn’t make me tick. I quickly realized that in order for me to be happy I needed to make a change. I did the thing that no one thought I'd do, I resigned from my position. Many people asked me why I would quit my job. The simple answer is that the paycheck I was receiving for doing the job did not provide me with any financial security. I'm not ready or willing to live that lifestyle of a stable yet unfulfilled job. It wasn’t my passion. It no longer felt right to do the job. I could spend the same amount of time sitting in front of my computer, never leaving my home, and make the same kind of money writing and marketing. It turns out, when I'm focused, I make substantially more. The reality is that bartending was never really my dream. It was something different for me. I had worked retail for so long, I needed to step out of that comfort zone. Retail is in my blood. I have extensive experience in retail. Bartending was a new creative experience for me.
What is my dream? I used to think that writing would just be a hobby for me. Through my teenage years, I never thought that I could actually make a living as a writer. Now, after a few years of working freelance, I realize that I really want to live the life of a writer. It's harder, but I'm much happier. It does take practice and I'm still a work in progress. Life is way too short not to do something you love. It's amazing how when you start with one small step, how that can build into so much momentum.
Wednesday, December 17, 2014
Have you ever had that sense of internal conflict about enjoying the present moment while also working toward your dreams? It's not a constant feeling for me, but an awareness that while I'm working every day to accomplish these incredible goals, which in turn shapes my future, that I may be missing out on the present that I am living in. I've found that finding the harmony between living in the moment while also planning for the future is something I struggle with. For me, the balance between today and the future comes from knowing that my intentions, my actions, and how I spend my time are leading me to a new place that I am hoping to create in the future. I actually feel more free and secure in pursuing my goals without the fear and anxiety that I used to have, because I know that it doesn't matter if I reach the exact goal I set out to reach, the journey is what matters.
Saturday, December 13, 2014
Howdy friends! I've been takings some time reading blogs and organizing my thoughts. I'm kind of in that phase where I feel like I am creating a landscape as to how I want my on-line life to be portrayed. I've noticed that there is not a whole lot of talking on fashion blogs, it's more about what I wore. All this reading, which is more like sifting through pretty pictures, it feels like comparing lives. It's easy to look at someone's blog and see this version of their curated life, and then look at your own and question your choices. You are constantly comparing your life, blog, wardrobe, photography, home, decorated skills, bank account, time-line for starting anything. Sometimes it feels like your life sucks in comparison to theirs. I think we have all experienced that feeling a couple of times, and it's a slippery slope, especially when you are looking at a peephole version of reality. Personally, I'm truly enjoying simply living in my life for awhile. There is less pressure when you are starting out new.